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NOW ACCEPTING NEW QUESTS

THECLEANUP
CREW

An elite party of senior engineers who clean up bad software — bugs, tech debt, and AI-generated chaos.

START NEW GAMEMEET THE PARTY ▾
  • For CTOs
  • VPs of Engineering
  • Heads of Engineering

A Wild Codebase Appeared

Your team shipped fast. Maybe an AI wrote half of it. Maybe a junior crew vibe-coded the MVP that somehow became production. Either way, the bill has come due.

You don't need a slide deck. You need senior engineers who can read the diff, find the rot, and fix it — without halting the roadmap. That's the whole job.

Shipped fast with AI, now nothing scales
Velocity has cratered under tech debt
A monolith only one person dares to touch
p99 latency creeping, cloud bill climbing
No tests, no types, no confidence
On-call is a horror game

Choose Your Party

Six specialists. 20+ years each. Full coverage across the stack — no juniors, no hand-offs to people who've never run prod.

Warrior — Cleanup Crew party member
Paladin — Cleanup Crew party member
Mage — Cleanup Crew party member
Ranger — Cleanup Crew party member
Sorcerer — Cleanup Crew party member
FE22 YRS

The Frontend Paladin

Frontend & UX Engineering

Slays runaway re-renders, tames 9MB bundles, and resurrects 60fps. Turns spaghetti component trees into a maintainable design system.

  • Render Optimization
  • Design Systems
  • State Untangling
  • Bundle Slimming
A11Y20 YRS

The Accessibility Cleric

Accessibility & Inclusive UX

Restores access for every player. WCAG 2.2 AA, screen-reader flows, keyboard nav, and focus management — so your product is usable and legally safe.

  • WCAG 2.2 AA
  • Screen Reader Audits
  • Keyboard Nav
  • ARIA Mastery
BE24 YRS

The Backend Warrior

Backend & Systems Architecture

Decomposes the cursed monolith, draws clean domain boundaries, and hardens APIs that buckle under load. Event-driven, idempotent, and boring (in a good way).

  • Domain Modeling
  • API Hardening
  • Event-Driven
  • Monolith Decoupling
PERF21 YRS

The Performance Mage

Backend & Runtime Optimization

Casts profiling spells on p99 latency. Hunts N+1 queries, memory leaks, and hot paths until your throughput doubles and your cloud bill halves.

  • Latency Hunting
  • Profiling
  • Caching Strategy
  • Load Testing
DB23 YRS

The Database Druid

Data & Query Optimization

Reads execution plans like ancient runes. Fixes missing indexes, deadlocks, and runaway migrations — restoring order to schemas grown wild.

  • Index Tuning
  • Query Plans
  • Schema Design
  • Safe Migrations
INFRA22 YRS

The Infra Ranger

Infrastructure & Networking

Navigates the wilds of Kubernetes, VPCs, and DNS at 3am. Builds reliable, observable, reproducible platforms with IaC instead of click-ops prayers.

  • Kubernetes
  • Networking & DNS
  • IaC
  • Observability

Party Stats

Codebase Triage99/99
Refactor Power97/99
Performance Magic95/99
System Reliability96/99
Years on the Clock99/99
Drama Generated4/99

Special Moves

Bug Slaying

We triage your most expensive, hardest-to-reproduce bugs and ship verified fixes — with the regression tests you wish existed.

Refactor & Rescue

AI-generated or junior-written code that shipped fast and now blocks the roadmap? We refactor it into something your team can extend safely.

Performance Tuning

End-to-end audits across frontend, backend, and database. We find the bottlenecks and cut latency, cost, and on-call pain.

Architecture Rescue

Strangling a monolith or untangling a distributed mess? We design pragmatic boundaries and a migration path that ships incrementally.

Accessibility Audits

WCAG conformance reviews with prioritized, code-level remediation — reducing legal risk and widening your market.

Reliability & Infra

Tame flaky deploys and mystery outages. We bring IaC, observability, and guardrails so 3am pages become rare.

The Quest

  1. Recon

    We audit the codebase, architecture, and metrics. You get a clear-eyed map of where the bodies are buried.

  2. Triage

    We rank issues by business impact and risk, then agree on a battle plan with measurable objectives.

  3. Cleanup

    We execute in small, reviewable PRs — fixing, refactoring, and optimizing without freezing your roadmap.

  4. Hardening

    Tests, CI guardrails, and observability so the same boss never respawns after we leave.

  5. Handoff

    Docs, runbooks, and pairing with your team — we level up your engineers, not just your code.

Ready to Continue?

Send us your scariest repo. We'll tell you exactly what's wrong — and what it takes to fix it.

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